Weddings, Gin, & Cabbage Boobs

So I've finally had some time to myself after a very looooong weekend/week. I'll recap the last week or so with a list-- because I love them.

  • Friday: R and I had plans to meet his sister and her boyfriend in Sandusky around 1. That morning, my mom (Hanna) and I drove out to Avon to talk to a catering company about ordering a couple dishes for the wedding. The pain in the ass 40 min trip turned out be a success. On the way back home, Hanna thought it would be a good idea to stop at the mall to do some mother/daughter bonding. Well who am I to refuse? So we stopped and shopped and we ended up home an hour and a half later then we had planned. Naturally, R was livid that I was late... blah blah blah. I tried to explain that I got him a really nice outfit for his stepsister's wedding we were going to that weekend ($100 dress pants for $16.50, how can you beat that?) but he was not having it. So he was mad and pouty and then he got over it, because he always does and we finally made it to Sandusky. That night, we went to Cedar Point which was awesome. The lines were super short! We stopped at Walmart on our way back to the hotel room to stock up on the 5 basic food groups: chips, candy, cheap wine, beer, and advil. We ate. We Drank. We went to bed.
  • Saturday: We all woke up and went to breakfast with R's dad. Then spent the day hanging out outside at the pool, mainly because it was heated and had a swim up bar. We got ready and went to the wedding. It might have been the shortest ceremony I have ever seen. Literally 3 minutes... IF that. But, the bride was beautiful, the groom was handsome and the reception was open bar. This is were I reunite with my ex- gin... somehow he manages to follow me to the karaoke bar we went to after the reception. We have a great time. Fast forward to the cab ride back to the hotel. Everyone is drunk. R's sister was a train wreck. She can barely walk, shes slurring, crying, throwing up on everything, etc. We get her back to the hotel and somehow manage to undress her--I have now officially seen my future sister in law naked. We manage to get her to sleep and then pass out ourselves.
  • Sunday: R and I wake up, and we immediately regret it. But unfortunately we have to drive back home so we can go to our Pre Cana catholic marriage thing. You have to do it or you can't get married. I'm really hating gin at this point- splitting headache, aching body, basically worst hangover ever. We go to this marriage thing which was basically married couples with a minimum of 6 children telling us about natural family planning. I am still convinced it was just another way for the church to recruit for the catholic army. All they want is your money and spawn. But anyways, we manage to get through the torture and go home and pass the fuck out.
  • The rest of the week is really dull so I will give you the abridged version: Work, errands, wedding stuff, and wishing I still had a life.
Today I finally had a chance to catch up on reading blogs and I just have to share this post by Lisa at Lemon Gloria. Lisa just had a baby (Congrats) and she has the most hilarious stories about life after her pregnancy. Her most recent post was about breastfeeding. Shes mentioned that she had found a remedy for engorged breasts that involved putting cabbage leaves. Naturally, I just had to check this out becuase it sounds ridiculous. Here are the details via mother-2-mother.com:

To use cabbage compresses for engorgement:
Wash a fresh head of green cabbage and place cabbage in refrigerator to chill. Just before use, crush the veins with a rolling pin or similar object or slice off the tops of the "veins" with a sharp knife, whatever makes the leaves shape to your breast most easily.
Drape one or two leaves over each breast, covering ALL of the engorged area. Leave on until they become wilted, about 20 to 30 minutes. Repeat three or four times within a 24 hour period, or until engorgement subsides. This will usually be within one to two days. If the engorgement is severe, compresses can be used as often as every 4 hours, but care should be taken as there is indication that cabbage leaves can work TOO well and end up reducing mother’s milk supply.
I'd really like to know who is responsibly for this remedy and how they discovered it. And no, those are not my boobs.

1 comment:

Tiffani said...

Hahah I totally thought you tried it. Thanks for clarifying these were not your ta-tas :-p